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Bonding with family time - Times Of India - Sat 19 Sep 2009
Ian Faria has some tips to build a strong bonding within the family
With the chaos and uncertainty that has become the norm, everyone needs a stable platform to launch themselves. Successful people know that one of the best platforms to launch from is the family. But, for a variety for reasons, the family too is fragmenting rapidly.
Here are some ways to prevent this fragmentation and solidify this essential establishment:
Build your attributes
You can build yourself to be the best that you can be, for your own good. Your strengths, when used for yourself, will grow. But when these are used for the good of others, will grow, and be further perfected.
Be sensitive to others’ needs
Be sensitive to family members' moods.When one member of the family is low, it affects the morale of the entire family. Stop focusing on your issues, and from time to time, look to help others.This is not only therapeutic, but strategic.
Building sensitivity is also good for you at work, or with your friends, and the practice you get at home will hold you in good stead everywhere.
Become the go-to person
Develop yourself and your charisma so that people in your family look up to you and want to bond with you. If you are an analytical person, and you are likeable, family members will feel more comfortable getting your help inhouse.
Structure family time
Have a meal together. This is one of the best ways to bond within the family. Everyone has to eat, so why not eat together? Even if people find it inconvenient to meet every night, plan to meet at least two or three nights a week as a worthy compromise.
Schedule activities of common interest regularly. This could be watching your favourite quiz, dance, song programme on TV, or it could be to go out for bowling, or a movie. This should be a fun activity that has no fixed agenda, and is driven by the outside world. Here, there is no pressure on the family to organise anything, so everyone can let their hair down and enjoy the togetherness.
Steal one-on-one time with one member at a time. This activity will not need everyone on board, and is easier to arrange. Here the bonding is deeper and more specific.
Family comes first
One must realise that there is a mutual dependence in the family that is sacrosanct. The world may let you down, but the most solid of all relationships should be within the family. In the ultimate analysis,isn't this too a part of the whole survival syndrome? People have to stick together, and be strong enough to withstand the winds of change, and upheaval that will happen from time to time.
Ian Faria. (The author is a corporate trainer, motivational speaker, counselor and consultant who specializes in Organizational and Personal Enhancement). faria@a-pep.com
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